


The Choices You Made

by Aifrit



Category: Apex Legends (Video Games)
Genre: Choices, Dark, F/F, Lesbian Character, Lesbian Sex, Mild Smut, POV First Person, Voidstrike
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:14:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24434176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aifrit/pseuds/Aifrit
Summary: "I can't keep watching, but I can't look away."
Relationships: Bangalore | Anita Williams/Wraith | Renee Blasey
Comments: 6
Kudos: 25





	The Choices You Made

**Author's Note:**

> Title: The Choices You Made  
> Pairing: Bangalore/Wraith (Voidstrike)  
> Rating: M for some sexual content  
> Words: 789
> 
> A/N: If you've followed me on tumblr the last few weeks, I've been on a rather serious Bangawraith kick. Like... really serious. I have a short series planned out for these two that I'd like to finish (I know, I know, I'm BAD at finishing things, but I have two fics done of this series at the time of this post, one of which is LONG). I wanted to get something smaller done in the meantime so this is it. Enjoy!

I was curious. I wanted to know. So, I sought you out.

Sometimes I watch your matches. Sometimes I watch you eat. Sometimes I watch you sleep.

Sometimes you fight with her. Sometimes you eat with her. Sometimes you _sleep_ with her.

Aren't you _so_ lucky? Wrapped up in your little cocoon, shielded from the dangers of the outside world for once. Away from your enemies and all your problems.

Safe.

I know you. You like the comfort she gives you, and how could I blame you? She stops Us from speaking. No warnings, no danger. When you lie awake in the dead of night, shivering from the chill of the void, she's there, arms wrapped around your waist. She's comfort and silence in ways you've never dreamed.

...God, my skin _itches_ where she touches you, _burns_ where she caresses you. I want to feel it, taste _everything_ she does to you. Every way she glides her fingertips under your breasts and ribs. Every way she marks you with teeth and tongue from neck to navel.

I want to know… I _need_ to know how she feels under you. Are her legs as solid as her arms? Do you feel her boxers between your thighs? Tell me. _Please_.

" _Y-Yes…_ "

Your words echo in my ear, but I know they aren't for me. I've seen you like this one too many times before. Delirious, drunk off lust, eyes glowing ghost-blue as she rips your shirt and shorts away. _Gone_. What do you feel when she wraps her lips around each nipple? What do you think when she sticks two fingers into your mouth to suck on? Do you burn? Do you ache?

I do.

I know what I feel? Longing. Have you ever felt that? Do you know how much it _hurts_? Of course, you don't. You made the choices you did for a reason.

Do you… _like_ the way she handles you? How she lifts you up and sets you down like a porcelain doll? How she flips you over and forces your face into her bed? Do you… _like_ the way she speaks to you? How she sings sweet nothings in your ear? How she laughs and taunts to get a playful rise out of you?

How does it feel to have your hand at her throat, fingers pressed over IMC dog tags? How does it make you feel to hold her arms above her head while you grind her lap, biting and _pulling_ her lip? Powerful? In control? That's what you've always wanted, right? And she gives it to you _so easily_.

I can't keep watching, but I can't look away.

It hurts.

Whatever remnant of a heart or soul I have deteriorates in my chest. I can't _bear_ to see _you_ writhing under her, spreading your legs to welcome _her_ hands, _her_ fingers _._ Moaning _her_ name like a prayer upon your lips. Collapsing, losing all sense of self and power as your eyes glow one final time for a brief moment of pleasure. It should be me. It should be _me_.

You look… happy, planting sweet kisses on her cheeks and nose and mouth. How does she taste to you? How soft is her skin? How do her arms feel wrapped around you as you succumb to sleep?

I wonder…

I want to leave. To go back to my own dimension. I can't. Masochism, I guess, in every sense of the word.

I sit and watch until dawn when she wakes up and kisses you good morning. The tenderness in her touch and voice kills me. How would I know she'd be this sweet or this loving? This is what I missed out on?

Funny how a single, simple choice ripples so far downstream. I'm learning that more often now. The choices we make, the choices _I_ make, are a matter of life and death, love and loss. Maybe if I'd forgiven her that one time. Or maybe if I'd let her walk me home. Maybe if I'd given her the Longbow instead of the Triple Take, who knows.

How _can_ you know?

She gets up; you pull her back down. Before I know it, I'm witnessing last night repeated, but it stings more this time. I can only imagine what it feels like to be under her, have her weight on me. Fuck… It's hard enough to keep my… fingers away from myself. Make my hands sit and fumble and obey. There's something so secretive and intimate about the early hours of the morning. I can't describe it, but I want it.

I want it _all_.

But I can only sit and watch. And then I wonder.

How easy it would be to replace you.


End file.
